How to get into communication with your teachers

You cannot not communicate. That is to say, standing motionless in a crowded room, even without saying word, you are still having an effect. You are always communicating something. You are always having an effect on others.

For example:

If everyone in the crowded room were asked to rate you on a scale of 1- 10 on a few characteristics, (pleasant, angry, happy, approachable, etc.) you'd get to see how you come across to others.

Here's how it would go. A surveyor (without you knowing it)  would walk up to everyone (but you) and say, "See that guy standing there in the middle of the room? On a scale of 1 - 10 (10) being very friendly and approachable, how would you rate him?"  "OK, now how about honest? On a scale of 1 -10 where would you rank him?" "And one last rating. Would you say he's a very happy person (10) or not so happy, or what?"

You might be surprised at how you come across.

The reason this is important is because at the very beginning of the class year your teacher only sees your face sitting however you sit. If you come across as pleasant then they will relate with you differently than if you came across non-verbally as upset or angry. Most importantly: If you have been dishonest with your parents (and have not been verbally acknowledged for each deceit, each lie, each abusive snarky reply) then your face suggests that you may have a problem with honesty and anger. It's an aura thing.

The way to tip the scales in your favor is to create a relationship at the very beginning. By relationship I mean, give the teacher some clue that you are a friendly nice person. The way you do this is very simple. When you first walk in the class room you look them in the eye and say, "Hi" or simply nod, if hi is a bit too uncomfortable. That's all there is to it. In that brief interaction you will have registered yourself in the teacher's mind as one of their allies, the friendly ones, one of the ones willing to be taught.

Some little known things about teachers:

1) Teachers have fear in their relationships with students and parents.

Most teachers have fear in their relationship with you, and they don't know it. They will find themselves monitoring their words with you to make sure they don't upset you, to do what they can to establish rapport with you, to find a common ground with you. Some find themselves walking on egg shells with you trying real hard to handle you exactly the way you need to be related with so as to inspire you to do your best. Some will treat you nice simply because they don't want to come across as racist.

2) Teachers want to pass you.

What most teens never get until they have left school is that 99.9% of all teachers really want you to learn. It just looks good on a Teacher's Evaluation Form if lots of their students go on to college.

3) Teachers have their own personal curriculum.

Each teacher has his/her own personal curriculum, their path, what they need to handle to experience being whole and complete. 

• Some teachers are working on learning how to do complete work, grading papers perfectly, because their tendency has been to do sloppy work.

• Some teachers have integrity issues and so they work hard at meaning what they say, "Homework done on time and neatly."

• Some teachers are working on patience because others have said they were too impatient, so the teacher is learning/practicing on being more patient.

• Some teachers have lots of fear in their relationships with student's parents so they are working on identifying the source of and disappearing their fear.

• Some teachers know their own parents have racial issues and so they work very hard to make unbiased judgments when it comes to discipline.

In other words, all teachers are working on their own stuff while they are teaching you. They are very human, very real.

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